Noah's Cafe

by Doug

One of Noah's new favorite games is to play restaurant. I'm the customer, and he's the waiter. If Claire is around, she'll join in too as his assistant. Here's a sample of what a typical visit to Noah's Cafe is like:

We are usually in the basement, and I'm sitting on the couch. Noah comes up to me holding a small pillow, which is where he writes my order. He gives me an imaginary menu.

"Waiter, what do you have to drink?"

"Umm, water, and milkshake, and egg nog."

"I'll have a milkshake please." "Waiter, what do you recommend to eat?"

"Salad."

"What kind of dressing do you have?"

"Blue cheese."

"Anything else?"

"No, just blue cheese."

"What else on the menu is yummy?"

"Salami sandwich."

"Ooo, I'll take one of those please. With mustard."

"Do you want french fries?"

"Sure."

Noah disappears around the corner for a few minutes, then comes back pretending to hold something.

"Here's your water." He hands me an imaginary glass.

"Thank you. May I have a straw?"

"There's already one in there."

"Oh, my mistake."

Noah disappears again for a little while, then returns, balancing pillow in his hand like a tray of food. He puts the pillow gently in my lap.

"What have you brought me?"

"French fries."

"Can I have some ketchup?"

"No, we don't have any ketchup."

"Where is my salami sandwich?"

"It's still cooking. It's taking a long time."

He disappears again, and I hear banging noises around the corner.

"Oh waiter? Waiter?"

"I'm coming. I'm getting you more water."

He brings another glass of water to me, and takes my empty plate (pillow) from my lap.

"I'll take the check now please."

He hands me the check, I hand him my credit card. I sign the receipt.

"Should I give you a big tip or a little tip?"

"A big tip."

No way, I never got my salami sandwich.